So I adopted these little fuzzies a couple of weeks ago:

They’re beautiful, aren’t they? The fluffy one is Maddie, and the tiny one is Allie.

I’ve always wanted a bonded pair, but both Kaylee and Kensi needed to be only cats and I’ve done my best to honor that. Now I have them, and I find myself having to practice more patience than I ever have with adopting a rescue cat.

• Kaylee walked out of her crate, took a few hours to adjust, but wanted to be close and cuddly almost right away.

• Kensi walked out of her crate and took a couple weeks to truly be my lap cat, but solicited attention right away and wanted to be close to me. I’ve had ten years of cuddles and purring and everything I could want in a cat.

It’s harder than I thought starting over again.

They’re already leaps and bounds ahead of the cats who hide for three weeks; they’re content to sleep near me, they’ll play with me when I get the wand and feather toy out, and allow and occasionally seek out petting and attention. They don’t run when I approach, they let me handle them without violence (Maddie even likes to be held). Even now they’re snoozing on the couch behind me while I work. Maddie sleeps on the bed with me. Allie is warming up slowly, getting more chatty and seems to like hanging out with me in the bathroom of all places.

But they don’t cuddle up, and I didn’t realize how much I miss it until I brought these two home and expected a quicker bond than they were ready for.

It hasn’t helped that some initial medical issues warranted more than a few trips to the vet and having to give medication every day – Maddie used to be more cuddly until I had to give her daily eye drops and oral meds and she doesn’t want to be close on the couch anymore. It’s easy for my anxiety brain to despair that she’ll never bond with me because her first memories of me are putting her in a towel burrito and dripping stuff in her eye or scruffing her to syringe foul-tasting liquid meds into her mouth. It also doesn’t help that Maddie reminds me so much of my sweet Kaylee that I’m expecting too much from her too soon. I’m so much more patient with Allie because she doesn’t remind me of either of my previous cats, and I quietly celebrate every overture I get from her or the glimpses I get of her personality. With Maddie I’m more WHY WON’T YOU LOVE ME?

I know it’ll get better. It’s barely been two weeks. I should be happy that they’re comfortable enough to hang out near me and letting me pet them without running or shying away. I am happy to watch them play together, enjoy the cat tree and toys I got for them. Maddie does jump up on the bed for petting when we’re in the bedroom. Allie is happy to rub my legs and tail tag me and arches into my petting hand. We’re getting there.